Gmail Labs that you should activate

I know for a fact that there are lots of people out there who still use Yahoo mail or Hotmail as their primary emails. To say that these email providers are obsolete is an understatement. Gmail has revolutionized email and continues to do so everyday. The stand alone Gmail without any lab experiments activated still beats Yahoo mail and Hotmail by miles. If you add selected lab experiments to your Gmail, you get to use email in its futuristic form. I never thought that email could have inline video embedding, ever! Gmail however, has made this possible in one of their lab features. I have summarized the most useful lab features available below.

1. Youtube previews: This is the video embedding feature I was talking about. Right now, it only supports youtube videos; but I'm sure this will expand to other video formats very soon.

2. Tasks: This creates a small notpad thingy where you can make notes or just jot down your daily tasks. A very quick and efficient way to write down and check your daily tasks.

3. Superstars: I recommend using either superstars or Gmail's inbuilt labels feature. Use one; not both. The function is to organize mail and keep your mail in easy to find categories. Personally, I use labels and don't see a real need to add superstars.

4. Old snakey: It's a game...and it gets pretty tough as you get to the higher levels. I like games like this that are simple yet challenging. It's also the only game on the list. You can add it...or not. It doesn't have anything to do with email; but whenever you need some fun, "old snakey" is always there.

5. Canned responses: This is perfect for those emails that require the exact same reply over and over again. Just store your template and use it whenever you need to.

6. Navbar drag and drop: This is required to rearrange your layout in your main Gmail page. The ability to customize your layout by moving your chat box, calendar box or labels box to optimum positions can have a significant affect on the way you work.

7. Forgotten Attachment Detector: This feature is genius. The amount of embarrassment this has saved me is too much to measure. It is a must have for all email users.

8. Multiple Inboxes: This is perfect for people having multiple email accounts. You can have up to 9 inboxes in your main page. It can also filter messages within your inbox, or sent items or even drafts and display them in your main page as a seperate inbox.

10. Undo send: This too is a must have embarrassment saver. It gives you a 5 second window to undo the message you just sent.

11. Search Autocomplete: This is a very useful feature for suggesting contacts, labels and attachments in the Gmail search button in the Gmail main page.

12. Inserting Images: I wrote a post not long ago where I described how you could add images to your email inline with the text using the "Send to" button on the Google toolbar. This lab feature now enables you to do exactly that. It looks like the Gmail team really do listen to their customers which is more than what can be said for the Hotmail team.

13. Google Calendar gadget: I use google calendar for my work. This gadget is perfect for reminding me of my appointments without having to go to the calendar homepage.

14. Add any gadget by URL: This is a good feature to activate; but since most of the google gadgets are not designed for Gmail, it might be not work as it should. Still, no harm in having a look through the gadget library and trying out some of your favourite gadgets in Gmail.

There are other gadgets which I'm sure are useful to lots of users; but lab features in the list I have compiled are perhaps the most important and most useful of them all. If you are still using Yahoo mail or Hotmail, I have only one piece of advice....ditch those pieces of s*** and switch to Gmail which just works!

Also, do check out the Gmail blog which is updated whenever there are new features added to Gmail or Gmail labs.

http://gmailblog.blogspot.com

Paranoid Billboard

The British have gone paranoid. Check out the photo of a billboard below to prove it.


Of course, you can improve the wording at this website (http://jamesholden.net/billboard/). I've attached my improvement below.

A small bug in Gmail

Just discovered a small bug in Gmail. If you activate "Always use https" under Gmail settings, you will not be able to use the "Send to" function in the Google toolbar.



The following error appears.
I am a strong advocate of https rather than http. Https encrypts any data sent through that particular site and is important to prevent data theft. More about https later...

foobar2000: A lightweight music player

I have searched everywhere for a decent music player that does not completely stall my computer just to play music. I first started out with Sonique. It was good, but the interface was not intuitive for some reason. I found it difficult to switch to different playlists because they were located in the wrong place; and it still was resource consuming.

The next option was Winamp. This was a very advanced player with so many features, that I figured that it was too complicated for me. Updating the player was like installing an operating system; and it would consume so much of memory that my computer would literally hang every time it switched to the next song. I couldn't do any other stuff if I had winamp running. I don't recommend Winamp for daily song playing although I do believe that their Shoutcast TV, Shoutcast radio and other online streaming services are very good.

Tired of the problems with the audio players that I had, I finally googled for a lightweight audio player and came across foobar2000.

foobar2000 is the least resource consuming music player on the web. It has a clean, simple, uncomplicated interface with all the functions other music players have. Although people can argue that Winamp is better because it has all the audio enhancing facilities; I say that your audio is only as good as your mp3 file and your physical speakers. The simple fact is, you just need a software to convert your mp3 files to data that can be interpreted by your speakers. Therefore, your output will only be as good as your input. Which means that if you have a 128kbps mp3 file, no matter the software you use, you will still get crappy sound.




Incidentally, foobar2000 is open source, free and is completely customizable. The original foobar2000 did not look like it does on my computer. I did some basic customization and rearranged some of the items to my preference. You can change the location of everything in the player. Although, I highly recommend reading the forums before making the changes yourself. There are also lots of downloadable customizations and plugins if you prefer. I myself feel that I have all I need with the basic player and don't feel the necessity for other plugins or skins. Try this player and I will guarantee that you will make it your basic player for all your audio files.

EDIT: foobar2000 is not open source as I mentioned in the article. The SDK is open source though. Strange! Thanks to Steve for the heads up.

How to Embed images in Gmail

Gmail is perhaps the most elegant and advanced free email services on the internet today. Google labs has made it even more flexible by allowing unbelievable customization. But the one thing that I was not able to do in Gmail was to embed images into my email messages. It's frustrating because an embedded image positioned in the right place in the body of the text has a significantly bigger impact than sending the images as attachments.

The suggestion on the internet by many people is to upload the image to a web hosting site and copy the image from there like text by dragging and highlighting the image. And then pasting it into your gmail message. But the process of selecting and copying the image is messy and very unreliable. You have to make sure not to copy any background text, tables, hyperlinks or any other doodles. If the image is the only item in the page, then it is difficult to select the image because it's difficult to know where to start dragging especially if it's an image that is bigger than the size of your screen. Also, I find that even after I have successfully copied the image, when I paste it in Gmail, the image still does not appear in the message most of the time; and I have to go back and repeat the steps until I get it right. Then I discovered a more simple and elegant solution that ALWAYS works.

You will need:
1. Google toolbar
2. An image on the internet.

I'm sure almost everyone who uses the internet has the Google toolbar. If you don't, you can stop reading this because you came to this post by accident. For the people who use the toolbar, lots of them do not activate the "Send to" button in the toolbar. Go to the Google toolbar Settings-->Click Options-->Click More-->Click Send to. That's it. You are done!



Now you need an image. If the image is not on the internet, you have to get it up there using photobucket or flickr or any image hosting site. Once you get it up, just go to that image url (see sample), click the "Send to" button and select Gmail. This will automatically embed the image into a new Gmail message. From there, you can copy it to another message or just use that message to send your email.

It's far simpler and less complicated than trying to highlight the image because this just works. This is a picture I took which has been uploaded to photobucket. Just go to this link and click the "Send to" Gmail to test this out.

http://i3.photobucket.com/albums/y56/irfan_mailme/DSCF0421.jpg

Ta-daa!


Incidentally, the "Send to" button will add any highlighted text with images on any web page (you can highlight this post- images and all and "Send to" Gmail to see this work). It's a very cool function that I use a lot. I hope this solves the image embedding problem for all Gmail users.

Add Google dictionary to your Firefox browser

Add the dictionary search to your firefox browser simply by typing a keyword and the search item.

To add the google dictionary to your firefox browser, search for the definition of a random word (Eg: Ameliorate) using google's "define: " function.


Now, simply copy the url (Eg:http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&rlz=1B3GGGL_en___
SG215&sa=X&oi=spell&resnum=0&ct=result&cd=1&q=define%3A+ameliorate&spell=1), go to bookmarks, click organize bookmarks, click new bookmark, and paste the url under "location".






Then search the url you just pasted for the word that you typed previously (ameliorate) and replace it with %s. (Eg: http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&rlz=1B3GGGL_en
___SG215&sa=X&oi=spell&resnum=0&ct=result&cd=1&q=define%3A+%s&spell=1). For the keyword, add a letter or word such as "d" or "dictionary" or "define"; or whatever you are comfortable with.



Click "ok" and go back to your firefox address bar to test the simple programming that you have just done.

If you typed "d" as your keyword, in your address bar, type "d ameliorate" and hit the Enter key to get the definitions of ameliorate.

By this way, you can apply it for any search you want to save for later use. All you will need is the url where you simply replace the item you searched before with %s.

The Dirty Receipt Trick

It's a new trick being used by retailers these days to prevent customers claiming damaged goods, refunds, and returns. I hereby give it the name it deserves - The dirty receipt trick.

The trick is simple. You select the items for purchase and head to the cashier. The cashier checks out the items, you pay for them and check the receipt to ensure that everything is in order and head back home. Upon reaching home, you find that the wonder broom that you bought with a 3 month warantee is broken in 3 places. You click your tongue in irritation and look for the receipt so that you could return it back to the store. Upon finding it in your jeans, you stare in horror at the condition of receipt. Blackened beyond recognition, the numbers on the receipt are no longer legible, useless for anything and certainly would not be accepted by the store.

What happened to the receipt you ask yourself? The answer is simple - dirty tricks by the retailer. The new scam is to print receipts on some weird kind of paper that when rubbed, blackens itself so that the numbers are no longer visible. The tricks works brilliantly when the customer puts the receipt into the pocket of theirs jeans or trousers. The act of walking causes the fabric to rub against the receipt thus causing it to blacken and hence saving the company from any returns or refunds that the customer might claim.

But wait, the trick doesn't end there. The paper is so cleverly designed that if by chance, you are smart enough to save the receipt until you get home and file it away safely so that no more rubbing can take place, another phenomenon occurs. The letters and numbers on the receipt start to fade for no reason at all. After a month, the letters are barely visible and again the receipt is useless for claims.

The audacity of companies to play such dirty tricks on their customers is unbelievable. Such actions should be challenged vehemently by consumer groups and be put a stop to. Unfortunately it's one thing to write about it, and a totally different thing to convert the writings to actions. I don't know if anyone else has written about this, if so, other consumers can write more articles and hopefully the issue will become big enough to challenge big companies to issue legible receipts.

Tuesday Blues!

Mondays are NOT the worst days of the week. In fact Mondays are actually pretty good days. The average Monday is the day that you meet up with your colleagues after that boring weekend. It's the day that you relax at work. It's also the day that you take time organizing your table, organizing your email, checking your favourite websites and spacing out until it's time to go home. Everyone including your boss is not in the mood to work that no one bothers you for the whole day. Whoever came up with the term "Monday Blues" is an idiot. Or maybe he just never went to work on Tuesdays. Because Tuesdays are the quintessential worst days that you can ever have in a week.

My proposal is to change the slogan to the "Tuesday Blues". Before you start having a go at me, consider your average Tuesday. You arrive to work late because you've overslept due to your body clock still working in "weekend mode". Disheveled and grumpy, you are harangued by bosses, co-workers, and even clients for work related matters. Meetings take place. Deadlines are set, and you start to panic. You realize that your entire week is destroyed because you would have to do OT to submit that report by Friday or get the sack. You work late, but after 3 hours at the computer, you realize that your efforts barely justify the hours put in and you call it a day. You come home grumbling and damning your boss to hell. Your mood is foul and your spouse decides to leave you alone for the rest of the day.

Compared to the average Tuesday, the rest of the week is pretty docile. Wednesdays and Thursdays are much better since you are now numb to the work related stress and are accustomed to the work environment again.

And Friday is a no-brainer. Everyone is happy in anticipation of the weekend; and any new work is postponed to the following week.

The cycle then repeats until you die or retire; whichever comes first. In all earnest, I really don't need to explain this. The average white collar worker, realizes the phenomenon; but sometimes we do need a reminder to call in "sick" on a Tuesday and not on the typical Monday to feel really better for the rest of the week. And that why we need to change the slogan to the "Tuesday Blues". Done!

I usually can't think of those things til later.

"I usually can't think of those things til later" That's what Horton said just after he released the tree trunk (while saying "This is where we get off!") which catapulted the vulture into a mountainside. I don't know if it's true for everyone; but I know that's true for a lot of people. They usually end up kicking themselves for days afterwards for not realizing the perfect comeback for the moment. The truth is, to be able to comeback the way you want to, takes practice, and I am sorry to say, some above average intelligence. You got to think on your feet you know. Spur of the moment stuff that'll put the guy in the spot. This means that you have to know things that the other guy doesn't. You also have to recall facts that are old, obscure and may seemingly not be relevant to the case. I guess the most important talent is the ability to identify when the conversation has crossed the boundary of "nice". Too often the victim is pushed onto the backfoot by continuing to "nice" long after the other guy has crossed the boundary. You can't please everyone, and as soon as you realize that the other guy has switched to rude or aggressive behaviour that's the moment that you need to turn yourself onto the same page. It doesn't happen often, but when it does, be prepared to make it as ugly as he is going to push it.

I have to say that some people are definitely better at "talking" than others. The natural talent is undeniably obvious as they identify ugly situations quickly and respond accordingly. They are admired because of their talent and end up doing big things later in life. Most of the great leaders fall into this category. Since there are more great leaders than ordinary people, I guess we can safely assume that most of us fall into the category of not being quick on our feet. I guess that's why the world still has enough nice people to go around.

I know that most of you guys must be thinking "You hit it right on the button pal. So what do us good guys do? What do I do when I am caught in the situation you talk about in your blog?". Well, lucky for you, I have a few methods that are guaranteed to work in those difficult situations.

Step 1: As he is pushing you back with his intimidating talk, put your hand to his face and say "Talk to the hand".
(Ideal outcome: He turns around and walks away. You turn to your admiring onlookers and bow twice to quell the ensuing applause.)
Step 2: If he doesn't turn around and walk away, he's going to blink absurdly at your reaction and come at you again with more verbal barrages. So your next step becomes quite simple. Clench fist....and POW! Right in the kisser!
(Ideal outcome: He falls flat on the ground with the crowd cheering you in the background.)
Step 3: If he didn't fall, quick turn and RUN!

There you go, 3 simple steps to punch the arrogance out of the nincompoops for the next 5 years.

Wise Tip: Just to be sure he remembers for the lesson for FULL 5 years, you might want to kick him a couple of times while he's on the ground to be absolutely certain! And if you want to make him remember for the next 10 or say 20 years, I got no objection. It's always good sense to plan for the future.

One of the coolest clips I've ever seen!

The Google Syndrome

There are many ways to get answers to questions. The traditional methods are asking parents, asking friends and asking teachers in that order. Reading a book to find the answers comes last in the list for the sole reason that human beings are lazy sloths and too much effort is required. Traditional research involved going to the library, searching through an index for "Robin Hood", then searching for the title through half an acre of books only to find that it's a 1582 page behemoth on "The Intricacies of the Plumage of a Robin's Hood", a subject that you never knew existed or would ever care about even if Robins took over the planet and killed all humans who didn't know their blessed hoods and ridiculous significances. Thus you would curse your way back to the catalog and hope that Sherwood isn't the name of the ear bones of Hamsters.

The effort involved is overwhelming and hours are spent in fruitless efforts to finding simple answers. But all that has changed with Google. The internet is useless without Google. It's like a library with no catalog. The difference between a library catalog and Google is that Google give instant access to answers without the hassle of wasting hours at the library. The system is so efficient that it beats parents, friends and teachers to take first place in the list. No more is there any need to ask anyone about anything. Just "Google it". Google can retrieve answers from simple queries such as "What is the temperature of the Sun" to an intricate detail such as "What bolt do I use to clamp a 12mm diameter aluminium plate to the web of 470x180x8.8x11 I beam". And this is precisely what the Google syndrome is all about.

The syndrome will enable you to learn all the knowledge that you can absorb in as much time as you spend in front of the "new idiot box". Although different from the old idiot box in that it involves more interaction with the machine, the fact that human contact breaks down to zero is reason enough for the classification "new idiot box". People may argue that you can join communities, networks and forums; and that you can make friends and be a human there as anywhere outside the computer. But face it. These "communities", "networks", "forums" and "friends" are just individual people in front of their screens at home basements wearing god knows what and just sitting there.

If you still can't realize it, just picture the person you are "interacting" with. He's just sitting there; in front of his computer - Squat! The point here is that even though it is possible to get ALL the answers through Google, it would just make a difference if we asked a teacher or a friend for the answers every now and then and revive some of the human interaction that is slowly being depleted by the Google syndrome. Therefore in order to contribute to the revival of human contact, the next time you need to know the "origin of life and how the universe came to be", just ask your teacher first; and if SHE doesn't know the answer, THEN try Google.

An addendum to my previous post!

In the advertising world, the word "FREE" is always in quotation marks. If there's one thing that's true in advertising, NOTHING is free if it is advertised; not even a stick of gum. There's always a catch. A catch that could cost a lot more than a stick of gum. So the next time they advertise "FREE" gum. Give them some chewed up gum as you pass by. It'll give them a whole lot more gum to distribute and you'll feel much better after your charity too!

The sincerity of advertisements

Ahhh...the Saturday Times. "Time to find some good bargains" you think. flip...flip...flip..."Hmmm....nothing yet" you mutter. Flip...Flip...Flip...."What the hell???" you raise your voice. FLIP! FLIP! FLIP! FLIP! FLIP!...."AAAAAAARRGGH...Where'd all the bargains go?" you scream.

Have the advertising agencies become so materialistic that they are unable to offer sincere advertisements to consumers? There are 2 issues to be addressed. The first is the sincerity of the advertisement and the second is the content of the advertisements. The responsibility for the former lies with the advertising agencies. While the responsibility for the latter lies in our society.

Judgment of the sincerity of advertisements are inherent in all readers. Hence the exclamation "Where'd all the bargains go?" previously. Advertisements that offer "SALE" or "SPECIAL OFFER" or "PROMOTION" immediately strike, not the "happiness" chord in our heartstrings. Instead the chord that starts tingling like a guitar string being played by Tracii Gun is the "Hold on, what's the catch" chord. Experience has taught us that there is ALWAYS a catch in the sale or promotion or what not. When we arrive at the shop, producing the ad or coupon to receive the discount or rebate, the cashier shrugs at the pronouncement, rings in the discount, adds the "Sale's tax", the "GST which is not included" and the "Price of the accessories which is also not included". Eventually, we come out feeling robbed and with little appreciation for the item purchased. And we have indeed been robbed. Conned into thinking we were receiving a deal, we were unfortunately ripped off royally right in the face.

Unfortunately, in scanning the advertisements in the paper, I can't count any that offer sincere services for the actual price. To put it more lucidly, I'd like to see an ad that advertises a product or service with the real price without the bargains or discounts or anything. I want to know how much it REALLY costs. Give me the discount after I get there. I tell you, I'd be one happy customer if I spent 20% less than I was expecting to spend on a product. I'd be so happy, I'd come back again. Why is it so difficult for advertisers to be sincere? That's what I want to know.

The second observation about the advertisements in the Saturday Times is the content of the advertisements. Adverts are not restricted to material and tangible products such as furniture, mobile phones, cars and real estate as I see in abundance in the papers today. Let it be known that advertisements can extend to non-materialistic products and services too. Seminars, talks, workshops, study courses, schools, universities, events, books etc... are literally non-existent in the colossal 240 page Saturday paper. I count only 3 advertisements that inform the public of an upcoming seminar or talk; which about sums up the choice for readers not looking to buy "The phone the world has been waiting for". The materialistic attitude of society is to blame and must be changed in order for such advertisement to re-emerge in the daily papers. It is about pursuing knowledge; NOT about passing exams. That's what needs to be remembered for any real change to occur.

And there you have it, my 2 cents on the advertisement situation in newspapers today. Television adverts have moral depraving issues...but that's a story for another day. Until next time, happy advertising to all!

The price of being late

Being early for work every morning is always a challenge for anyone who has a strict employer. In addition to the bad reputation at work, the cost of being late can be hidden as well as obvious. When I mean costs, I mean the actual money lost and not the emotional distress etcetera etcetera...

The hidden costs can be as drastic as losing your job (thousands of dollars of salary) or as minor as losing a few cents from your paycheck. The obvious costs include the actual tangible money lost on the day of being late. In my world, the cost of being late increases exponentially every minute I am late. My increase is costs is as follows:

Late by 5 minutes: 40cents on food where I have to buy breakfast at a more expensive cafeteria rather than my regular stop which is a little out of the way.
Late by 10 minutes: 40cents (food) + 1 dollar on transport where I take an additional bus to reduce the walking distance from the bus stop to my office building
Late by 15 minutes: $8.40 on taxi. And forget about breakfast...
Late by 30 minutes: $25.00. How? Called in sick. The $25.00 is payment for the Medical Certificate at the local clinic.

In truth, people know the tangible costs involved because they are felt everyday. The mind makes the effort to avoid them even though we ourselves are unaware that we are doing so. The early morning sees people rushing to work because they realize the costs involved. But they don't realize that it's an unconscious decision. I mean the brain's dead in the morning anyway. Most people are practically sleepwalking themselves to work for crying out loud. I know it because I do it. I wake up....and the next thing I know, I'm work...and I have no idea how I got there. So if this is you, rest easy as you're not alone.

Some people tend to be alright in spending the "late fees" everyday. Unfortunately, too bad for them, they're unemployed. Or they're filthy rich (lucky sunofaguns). For the rest of us who fall into the category of "Not being ok paying the late fees", this is a lot of dough. Which for me, now that I know my price for being late, means that I'm NEVER going to be late again. Then again, maybe not...

What should I do with my life? by Po Bronson

An article by Po Bronson at here that should get you thinking. Please check out the article at the above link.

There are 2 types of people....

There are 2 types of people in the world today. The people who waste time on the internet and the people who don't. The people who waste time on the internet (such as yourself) browse websites, read useless blogs and essentially waste the precious minutes of their lives watching Britney Spears drive a car (OMG she can drive! I see her driving OMG OMG OMG! I NEED to watch it again). The people who don't waste time on the internet are in the real world, the world that matters; living life the way it was meant to be lived. They are working their jobs, paying bills, having fun, meeting friends and essentially making their lives worth living.

Unfortunately, I, like the time wasters on the internet have succumbed to the addiction of the internet, which is as real as being addicted to cigarettes and alcohol. Anyway, now that I'm here, I might as well discuss the issues of this addiction.

The time wasters would while away hours in a day browsing websites and watching videos that neither enhance their knowledge nor contribute in any way to their personal enhancement. News on the internet is NOT the news pages on yahoo, msn or google. On the contrary, the most clicked news links on the web are not related to the important world events at all. The most popular "news" on the internet is Dumbledore being gay.

Dumbledore is not even a real person! I mean, why couldn't it at least be someone who lives in the real world, even if the news is as useless as his sexuality. Why did it have to be a fictitious character? Anyway, it just goes to show the type of wastage going on. In fact, the "news" is so proliferated on the net, that it is impossible to NOT encounter the news even by accident. Eventually, it's best to just click the link, satisfy your curiosity and move on.

The fact is that it's not that people don't have work other than browsing the internet. It's that they ignore other responsibilities in order to do so. Which is what makes the whole browsing of the internet a waste of time. Therefore, if browsing the net is taking up a significant part of your time in a day, please switch the computer off and go watch some TV. I know that watching television is a waste of time too, but at least it's not as addictive as the internet!

If you are using firefox and are unable to break the addiction, you can at least keep track of lost time using this convenient add on at this link:

https://addons.mozilla.org/en-US/firefox/addon/1887

Tech Support

A recent conversation between my brother and Linksis' tech support proved so ludicrous that I deemed it worthy to write about it in my blog.

Too often have tech support guys complained of the technical incompetence of customers that numerous websites have been created that vividly illustrate the various idiotic antics performed by them on their computers. This example will illustrate a similar story; except with the idiot role being reversed.

My brother being technically savvy and able to solve most IT problems, rarely ever calls anyone for technical support. However, the new Linksis modem that he purchased seemed to be giving an unusual problem that even he couldn't decipher. After trying all the various solutions including resetting and reconfiguring the modem, the problem still wasn't solved. Unfortunately Linksis does not have a repair center in his country. Therefore, the only solution was to replace the modem which was still under warrantee. Reluctantly he calls the help line. The call progresses as follows:

Bro: Hello, I'm calling to report a fault in my modem model number: E6172M which is under warrantee and would like to get it replaced.
Linksis: Hello. My name is Andrea. My ID number is 04831870139J. How may I help you?
Bro: I just told you...Anyway I'm calling to report a fault with my modem model number: E6172M which is under warrantee and would like to get it replaced.
Linksis: Please tell me your modem model number Sir.
Bro (sigh): E6172M
Linksis: And you are having a problem with your modem Sir?
Bro: Yes; but it can't be fixed. I have reset and even reconfigured my modem with the same result.
Linksis: Let's try to reset the modem Sir. I will guide you through the process
Bro: aaargh.

...15 minutes later

Bro: Now are you satisfied that it is broken? I reconfigured the modem and it still does not work. We don't need to go through the reconfiguration process again.
Linksis: That is very nice sir. Have you tried reconfiguring the modem? Let's try to reconfigure the modem. I will guide you through the process.
Bro: BUT I HAVE ALREADY DONE IT! ARE YOU RETARDED?????
Linksis: You have NOT reset the modem Sir? Why don't we start from the beginning. I will guide you through the process.
Bro: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!

...45 minutes later

Linksis: And are you still having the same problem Sir?
Bro: YES DAMMIT!
Linksis: Let's try something different Sir. Let's try disconnecting and reconnecting the modem. After that, let's reset and reconfigure the modem once again to make absolutely CERTAIN that the modem is faulty.
Bro: CLICK!

It was another 1 week and several phone calls with other "tech support" officers before a replacement was issued.

Needless to say, my brother never called "tech support" again.

Sarah Silverman is a poor excuse for a human being

The recent MTV Movie Awards demonstrated the level of human dignity that the world has been plunged into.

Sarah Silverman opens the show with a racist joke. Then, humiliates veteran actors and actresses and finally ridicules, insults and humiliates Paris Hilton. There's no excuse for such base behaviour. It is beneath human dignity.

Sarah Silverman continued to insult fellow actresses by referring to them as....well...watch the clip. Even if the famous Sarah Silverman uses such bad language; it is beneath my dignity to use it even to describe what she said.

The audience continued to clap her through her vicious so called "jokes", thereby endorsing and encouraging her attacks at members of the acting community. Even though the people in the audience continued to smile, their eyes indicated that the "jokes" were unwelcome and would rather have walked out than continue to listen to a person with no sense of compassion, empathy or even basic manners. Her behaviour instead demonstrated a sadistic, nasty and vile nature that sullied and depraved the entire movie awards ceremony.

What was to be a glamorous ceremony full of culture, glamour and festivities turned out ugly and disgusting after Silverman's attacks; leaving the ceremony in ruins. It would have been completely appropriate if the audience decided to leave the ceremony in disgust. However, the audience are not to blame as they too, being ill educated in the basic manners and ethics (hollywood mentality) were unable to decide what action to take in the situation.

It is important that people realize the importance of civility in society. Ethics, manners and civility are no longer taught in schools and are partly to blame for their low levels in today's world. While the media promotes, encourages and even praises bad behaviour, the people should consciously realize that it is wrong and make the effort to bring back these values into the world.

Let there be respect and dignity for everyone regardless of their race, religion, colour or status.

The Ethics of our Society

With the advancement of technology, the opportunities for the average person to steal, embezzle and commit fraud has increased tremendously. Unfortunately, opportunity is all the average person needs in order to commit a crime. Out of 100 people, 10% would be honest no matter the circumstance, while 10% would be dishonest in any situation. But the more troubling percentage is the remaining 80% who would steal whenever the opportunity presents itself. So 90% of humanity are out to rob the world at any one time.

The crux of the matter is that the ethics of our society has to dropped to such a low level that only 10 people in 100 would do the ethically right thing. Unfortunately, this is attributed to the fact that ethics are no longer taught at an early age. Conscience has to be fed through ethics education. Otherwise it deteriorates leaving a self justified criminal behind. The fact that criminals stoop to the level of justifying their crimes indicates the level of ethics inculcated in them.

Imagine that you are the manager of your store. One day, you discover that your bank has cashed cheques to a Mr John Smith. As far as you know, you did not write any cheques a John Smith. You call your bank and investigate further only to discover that John Smith is none other than your trusted cashier Ms. Emily.

You, being old school and brought up where your father's mere stare was enough to confess all and beg forgiveness from god himself, call her into your office and confront her with the evidence in order that she may show signs of repentance so that you can testify should too harsh a sentence be given out.

You: How could you do this to me? I trusted you completely.
Ms Emily (shrugs shoulders): I found the cheques on your desk and helped myself.
You: WHAT?!?!?!
Emily: Yeah. They were sitting there....and I took em.
You: WHAT?!?!?! You took em????
Emily: Yeah. Actually I deserved them.
You: WHAT?!?!?!??!
Emily: Can you please stop shouting "what" everytime I say something. Anyway, as I was saying; I deserved them. You want to know why? Because I don't have enough money for my weed. So in order to satisfy my lifestyle, I needed more money. So I deserve it.
You: WHAT?!?!?!?!?!
Emily: Also, my boyfriend lost his job by stealing from his boss and he really needed some dough to get the new bike he always wanted. And I really couldn't say no to my boyfriend now could I?
You: WHAT?!?!?!?!?
Emily: Plus he's soooo cute. You can understand that can't you?
You: WHAT?!?!?!?!
Emily: Anyway I needed the extra cash for this tattoo right here. Isn't it a beauty? I got it yesterday. It only cost $500. You should get one too. I can....

(Police walk in and take her away....)

Emily: Hey Mr Policeman, you think this tattoo is cute don't you? Tell him will you....

You feel faint and grab the nearest chair for support; faith in humanity dashed to a million pieces while you wonder "Will there ever be trust again?".

Relief, Euphoria and Tortured Souls!

Hi folks,

It's been a while eh? But the break really paid off. I translated my blogging time into studying time...and my final results yesterday proved that it was the right move. I have finally graduated after 4 yrs of blood, toil, tears and sweat: to put it in the words of Winston Churchill.

As a bonus, my results were the best I've ever achieved in my 4 yrs. So in addition to feelings of relief, feelings of euphoria are also floating around in my dorm room.

Unfortunately, my juniors can't stand my company anymore, as I take every opportunity to remind them of the agony they are enduring while I bask in the glory of freedom. It really is shameless the way I shred their souls with my relentless taunting. It's like a disease, and I can't help it....teeheehee! It's not my fault actually. It's like they want me to do it. A typical conversation goes thus...

I'm walking down the street and a junior hails me....(first mistake)
Junior: Hey man, congratulations! I heard that you graduated...good work!
Me: Thanks man.
And then comes the unfortunate question that ensures their undoing...
Idiot Junior: So what plans now? (too late....)
Evil Me: Oh...I don't know. I think I'm going to have some fun! Because I can finally sleep peacefully at night without having to worry about assignments or exams or projects or anything! I tell you man....this freedom feels SOOOOOO GOOOOOOOOD! I mean, I wake up at 4pm and I feel no guilt. I stay up all night...and watch sooooo many movies....that I can't even remember how many I've watched.....I watched all the episodes of "Friends" in 2 nights man. By the way, have you seen the movie "Serenity"?
Idiot Junior: ....err no...I have an...
Evil Me: Never mind....it's the best film ever...You really should watch it as soon as possible. Have you watched Spiderman 3?
Idiot Junior: err...assignment...due...
Evil Me: I've watched it already....and I'm going to see Pirates of the Caribbean 3 tonight...and some others as well while I'm there.
Idiot Junior: ....3 projects....
Evil Me: And I'm also headed to Malaysia next week....do some mountain climbing, hiking etc....It's gonna be soooo much FUN!
Idiot Junior: ...mid-term....
Evil Me: And after that maybe I'll do a tour of Thailand...and Philippines...
Idiot Junior: god kill
Evil Me: and Indonesia....
Idiot Junior: me
Evil Me: and Hong Kong....
Idiot Junior: NOW!
Evil Me: and....

And +1 to my tortured soul list.
Damn it feels good to be free!